Writing update and accountability post Feb. 7

Lots of non-writing bits of the writing life in this Jan 19-Feb. 7 period. Been learning, or rather re-learning a lot of stuff that has nothing to do with writing, but has to do with the writing business. 

State of me and how that impacts my work

Bouncing between depression and fury, political action, local caretaking and paralysis. So, yannow, like everyone else in the U.S. in the last 20 days or so. Been making calls to my Senators and Representative.

All of that makes writing very hard for me personally. Been supporting another writer whose work is flowing in amazing bursts of story; supporting my regular writing community, trying to overcome the "who needs my book in this world" self-defeatism myself. Apparently I need my book, so I'm starting to move forward, if slowly. 

Also had jury duty orientation. Did some volunteer work for my choir. Sang some. Had friends over for dinner, visited another friend and took her to appointments, checked in on a few friends. 

Reviewed my publication plan and created an updated list of tasks. 

Changed the backend of my website slightly to shift away from google and create emails based off my website. Had to do that before I could do anything else because I wanted the emails working.

 Renewed my membership in the Independent Book Publisher's Association, and purchased a block of 100 ISBNs with the discount that comes with that membership. (Which saved me about half the cost of their membership fee, and that was just one discount, so I'm pleased). Most people won't need that many, but I have three books at various states of being ready, and each format-- audiobook, MOBI, EPUB, AZW, PDF, trade paperback and hardcover if you're doing that-- requires a separate ISBN number. They come in bundles of 10 or 100, so three books times seven is 21 (I won't be doing all seven but I already can see I need more than 10, so.)  I waffled on getting them and how many to buy for MONTHS, so getting my membership and buying them had become this huge mental hurdle. And, like most procrastinated tasks that feel like mountains, it took me a grand total of 15 minutes to actually make the purchase and ensure it had gone through and I had access to them.

Will I learn from this? Probably not.

In between doing that I submitted four short stories, critted six stories for others, straightened out a miscommunication with my editor about book three (only a minor panic attack, that) and got two rejections. 

What I've learned/practiced this week

- One foot in front of the other. 

- Don't tear your allies down, especially when you must confront a multi-faceted enemy. You fight your fight and let them fight theirs. You can't know which attack will be the most effective, and we're all the most motivated to fight for the things that matter the most to us.

- You can make political calls even if your voice shakes and you cry. 

- Quoi qu'il en soit (what that it some is/might be) means "regardless" or "be that as it may." 

- Joy is essential, even in hell. Feed your joy.

What I've been reading and what I've appreciated/learned from it

Finished reading both Teller of Small Fortunes and The Serviceberry this week. 

I appreciated the warm coziness of Teller of Small Fortunes, the sweetness of the characters and the sense of "little people lost in a big world who still make a difference for each other." Leong wrapped up loose ends from various adventures in satisfying ways, and created endearing characters with relatable flaws and needs--an ensemble cast I wanted to succeed.  Each of the character's desires were clarified in dialogue, narrative and action at various points during the story, so there was no hitting over the head with a single block of "as you know Bob" explanation. A novel gives one the space to do that, but the reminder that all three are useful to reinforce character is a good one.

Wall Kimmerer's Serviceberry is an expanded essay, an exploration of an alternate economy with a botanical example -- the serviceberry- at its core. As a plea for ecological sanity in a country gone nuts with capitalistic crypto fever, it feels both well-timed and ... sad. I could have enjoyed reading this much more during a Harris administration. But alternative economies may get us through yet, so I recommend it. Her descriptions of interconnected communities made me think about the assumptions I'd made about the communities in my own writing and how my background had colored how I'd drawn them AND what I'd left off the page and might want to at least hint at in a better fashion.

Projects status update

      Books: Updated publication plan. 

Next step: finish new intro to THWARTED.

      Short stories: Four more submissions, two more rejections.

Next step: More submissions, write more tie-in ss.

      Marketing: Next step: research hire versus DIY

      S&W work: Everything listed above; website update, IBPA renewal, ISBN purchases, educational vids.

Next step: Metadata gathering and give to ISBN registrar and ... Amazon? I guess? Research metadata.  Also finalize cover design.

Writing update and accountability post, Jan. 19

State of me and how that impacts my work

Well, this update isn't going to be as impressive as last week's.  I got a few things done but very little writing. Spent some time thinking about how to emotionally prepare for, and cope with, the incoming political clusterfuck, still have some thinking to do. Walked five separate days, including today; my longest walk of the year so far. 

Did some organizing and clearing out in my office, with some great assistance. Holiday stuff is packed away for next year. All my character generation stuff is now in one place. My tax papers are pulled together. I now have a workable sitting and standing work surface. Physical organization helps reduce the mental overwhelm. 

Also have been in correspondence with another writer who's working on a debut novel. I'm basically just being a supportive being, because he's got chops and I'm excited to see where his writing goes. It's been good for my soul. 

What I've learned/practiced this week: 

Practicing patience with myself. 

Re-learned that having too many goals confuses my brain and scatters my focus.

Also, apparently a desk that's too clean makes me a tad nervous. 

What I want to practice next week:

Create ongoing time slots for various types of non-writing but related chores like marketing, story submission, S&W stuff, which aren't getting done.

Daily writing.

Stay off social media as much as possible.

What I've been reading and what I've appreciated/learned from it:

Finished reading The Sapling Gate. The ending felt earned but a tad rushed, and my dread sense that something TRULY awful would happen faded as the ending neared. The author successfully threaded a narrow aperature in terms of plot, came up with some eerie creatures and villainy, but (spoiler warning)  left us with that now-familiar taste of "not all the bad guys can be held accountable." 

Also critted another Wordos' short. Reminder to think through main characters' motivations and personalities. 

Projects status update:

Books: spent two hours on the new opening of Thwarted.

Short stories: Reviewed, tightened and submitted one story, received critique on a short story, received one rejection.

Marketing: none

S&W work: none

Submissions this year: 2

Rejections this year: 1

Writing Update, an accountability post. Jan. 10

Decided I should try to update this more often, as an accountability effort. I need to get back to the keyboard in work mode instead of fuck-around-on-the-internet mode. 

So, in writing last week (the last 10 days): 
SHIT I GOT DONE

-Did a skill-building roll-up with Nina on New Year's Day, wrote around 300 words. 

-Revised and submitted one short story, revised and signed up for critique for a flash piece. 

-Drafted and posted my year-in-review for 2024, and updated my books read. 

-Made a list of short stories to submit in January. 

-Listened to a writing podcast.

-Looked up what "subversive" literature means and how that varies depending on who's using it.

-Listened to an online session on meditation for writers and one on premise.

-Critted two stories. 

-Started reading The Sapling Cage and finished Hunter's Prayer.  

... Good thing I write this shit down, because when I sat down to type I'd forgotten I'd done ALL of that except for the reading and the New Year's Day rollup. My brain, man. 

Still somewhat depressed and crunchy from insomnia night before last, but I've reached the functional stage of recovery so I'm calling that a win. 

WHAT I LEARNED/RE-LEARNED/PRACTICED THIS WEEK

Meditation workshop was irritating because the download kept glitching (tech issues are a major peeve, who knew?) 

Other class was on premise, from which I re-learned that everyone defines premise differently. Her definition was essentially excruciatingly tight back cover copy. (When [X] happens to PROTAG, they must [Y] to achieve [Z]).  So my premise for DUBIOUS would be "After a doomed generation ship is contacted by aliens, timid thirteen-year-old Opal accepts being chosen as translator. Initially dazzled by the generosity of the alien in her head, she realizes this new world comes with political dangers, and she must learn to protect both her community and her new mental friend."  As a first draft, that sorta works. Otherwise class was a lot of rehashing stuff I knew; good reminder that a strong theme readers connect or relate to is needed to keep them interested, and pitches help your own personal clarity. 

So one of the zines I was looking at submitting to referred to subversive literature. Subgenre classifications often annoy me. A, I don't like putting labels on my work because what I see in it often isn't what others see, and B, people throw those words around and sometimes I'm not sure they know what they mean and other times I think they're just being... hoity. To be fair, I do not always understand what some of those words mean when applied to literature. An MFA I am not.

So I took an admittedly shallow dive into the literary meaning of "subversive," trying to understand what THOSE EDITORS meant by it. They referenced an essay I am not going to link to here, which in the fewest words (it was long) seemed to be saying that reverse subversion was now a thing, and they were embracing that. So... if "boy gets girl" is a trope, and "boy gets boy" or "boy prefers life alone" subverts that trope, but such story subversion has become mainstream, then "boy gets girl" is now subversive. That's what I took from it, and that seems to be what those particular editors (it's a new zine) seem to be wanting. 

Sigh. Whatever. Just say, "we're looking for stories that stick to traditional norms" instead of handwaving that "it's cutting edge to be traditional."  

For what it's worth, here's Merriam Webster on "subvert: to overturn or overthrow from from the foundation, ruin: 2: to pervert or corrupt by an undermining of morals, allegiance or faith.

Elsewhere, subversive literature is defined as either works that oppose or challenge the existing social norms or order, or works that challenge the current literary or genre norms. The goal is to make the reader think about what they are reading as well as the world in which they live. Such works often have descriptions like "controversial" or "shocking," although only in the time in which they were written -- subversive works in Victorian times are considered classics now, like Wuthering Heights. Animal Farm and 1984 were subversive works in their day. Putin and our CFOOO might consider Animal Farm subversive still, for.... reasons. 

Subversion can also be in the eye of the beholder; apparently some people consider children's books such as Maurice Sendaks' The Wild Things to be subversive. I adored that book as a child and I still love it and am bewildered it was ever controversial. So one's values can impact what is considered subversive. 

So, subversive did mean what I thought it meant. That said, I thought "make you think" was what literature was SUPPOSED to do, so I've always been a bit baffled by the label. Redundancy for emphasis' sake? 

Moving on.

READING:

Finished Lilith St. Crow's Hunter's Prayer. (I've been reading the Kismet series out of order because ... I pick up what I pick up when I pick it up. Also, I'm an idiot).

St. Crow does tension and unrelenting stress really fucking well, and well as trauma without the male gaze. If you like dark monster-hunting urban fantasy with a kick-ass woman protagonist, Jill Kismet is fun to follow.  I could not watch a movie of St. Crow's books, there is too much gore, but I can turn my visual brain down and blip over it while reading. There are a few places I argued with choices she made  (a new brain wiggle I've developed that comes from writing your own work, and one I'm not sure I like) but she ended up addressing 95 percent of that in later action.

 Started reading The Sapling Cage, am about 70 percent through it. I'll actually finish in time for book club this month. I keep putting it down, waiting for the next thing to be unremittingly grimdark, and then being relieved when I pick it up again. That may be a holdover from the St. Crow universe, which is darker that Margaret Killjoy's world. Or seems to be; they're dark in different ways and I haven't finished the book yet.

It's a coming of age story, with teenagers making teenaged decisions with teenage logic, so I have that frustration with it, but it has an interesting, well-crafted world and an interesting plot and a so-far unseen villain who feels truly power-hungry, so I'm along for the ride. 

St. Crow's work is tighter, grittier and constantly reminds you the protagonist lives in a world of immediate harsh consequences. Also, the catharsis of splitting monsters' throats. The Sapling Cage introduces you to consequences more gradually, and they are occasional very harsh as well. But the world isn't as dangerous, at least not yet. I can see how the text for each book does that, so it was useful to read them so close together.

Also reading Jerusalem because my brother gave it to me. I think I've read a chapter since the beginning of the year. It's a slog of real battles and real massacres in our real world, written by a man, that largely features men -- power-greedy or religiously-motivated/obsessed men-- with the occasional driven woman. It's both educational and depressing; grinds it into the reader just how long and how bloody the conflicts over that "holy ground" have been. A book to sip, rather than gulp. Also is evoking a short story/novellette in me in response, and I don't have time for that, so I'm taking it slow.

Projects status update:

BOOKS

The manuscript for DUBIOUS is done and needs the next steps -- layout, cover, publication date and marketing.
THWARTED is largely done but needs a new opening; I drafted one but it will need some honing and revision. Then it will need the same. 

It has occurred to me that  Thwarted ends in what could feel like the end of a second act. I didn't think of the duology as a trilogy -- it was a single book -- but I should outline what happens in the next 50 years very clearly so I can fill in as necessary during revisions for PURPOSE. And possible a coda at some point.

PURPOSE is with the editor. 

DRAFTING

I set a goal to write daily and skill-build regularly. The intention was that such writing would be story-and-skill based. While I updated the blog, I can waste a lot of time that way so I decided that blog or social media stuff was extra and wouldn't count. 

I only drafted new stuff once this week. I did review and revise two stories though, and that should count! Revision time is important.

STORIES

Came up with a list of SS to submit this month. Typing them up here in case I misplace the piece of paper I scribbled them on:

   "Fire Station" (submitted! also renamed "Some Connections Don't Burn")

   "Parsec Omega" (possible rewrite)

   "Doodles of Spacetime" (might need rewrite)

   "Inconvenient"

   "Swallowed by My Patrol Car, A Report"

   "Smells Like Lunch"

   "The Right Aisle"

   "Songs of Change"

   "Hooked on Music"

 

None of those are in the universe the books are in. I should take a look at the book-related shorts and see if any are clean and clear enough to submit in February, or to substitute for the rewrites above.

NONWRITING

- Critted last week's stories; need to crit a story for Tuesday's meeting.

- Need to set a publication date and other tasks as listed above; need to sort the workflow and related tasks necessary between now and publication.

- Taxes. 

 

MARKETING

    - I need to contact the cover artist. I've been putting that off for months.  

    - Review publication plan and add deadlines.

    - I might ought write some online reviews of other authors' works. 

    - Once I get the cover sorted, I'd like to make some ribbons and other bling for Worldcon and Miscon.

    - Social media accounts are languishing, I should figure out what I'm going to do with them this year based on the lists above, and then set up some posts for S&W and for my own work. 

2024 in the rearview mirror

I don't post here often enough. Also, I beat myself up too much.

 sigh.

It was a busy year. This review is late because I put it off, thinking it would amount to very little and I can't help comparing myself to others. But then I did a "highlights reel" list and ... there was a lot on it. So.

First and foremost, I finished a novel!

Then incorporated feedback from an editor and several sensitivity readers, and then it was so long I decided I had to split it into a duology. Finished the first half in prep to publish it--and it's done. I mean... I would have published it in the fall, but I couldn't face the possibility of trying to do an author launch right after the election. So I put it off to 2025. But. A book! Is! Done!

For a serial incompletionist, this is huge.

I have cover art, if not yet a cover, and the pieces of a publication plan, even.

Wish it felt more like YAY!!! Than yay?!?

My brain, y'all. (Also, this world, but ... later).

Also in 2024 I prepped another manuscript (edited it to be congruent with the above manuscript) and sent that off to the editor. Wrote a few short stories. 

Took a weekend and a another week just for writing/revising, the first with some SFF buds and the second with my long-term crit group/writing sisterhood.

Went to three SFF conventions and took a week in Scotland, OMG, Scotland was amazing. The cons were great too.

A few weekend trips/events with friends and partner -- Randy Rainbow, a wine-tasting thing, Eugene Gay Men's performance, Lewis Black on his farewell tour, bartenders' competition at the downtown event, friends' reading at a bookstore,  an anniversary trip, a bookstore getaway and dinner, a low-key and delicious yule at the coast with friends.

Spent about a day a month thinning and organizing. It's... helping. I have a few problem areas remaining, but I'm not paying for a storage unit anymore and the house feels ... like a place people live. Comfortable. Like I'm not embarrassed if someone shows up at the door. It's a ridiculously huge weight off my soul. 

Medical stuff (nothing serious, but finding a provider who actually listens is huge.)

Also, spent a few hours a week much of the year helping out with a friend who's having ... life. 

Finished the French tree in Duolingo; kept my streak all year. Keeping up with review on that while I dabbled with a few other languages; settled on Spanish, which I've been working on more slowly.

Singing-wise, I took part in two regional competitions (solo), performed with my choir in the spring and at a national choral conference, and sang with them this fall until my depression got to me. 

The election levelled me. 

 

sigh.

There was no working on the election in that list above. I didn't have that in me. Just a shit-ton of donations to candidates and organizations. I dunno if it helped hold the tide. It doesn't feel like it. I don't begrudge the expense, hell, I feel like I should have done more. But oddly enough, it's not effective to scream at voters to get them to change their worldview or their propoganda-laced viewpoints, and that's where I've been most of this year. So. No working on the election, just writing checks. 

We live in DeliberateIgnorance-plus-Naziland now, and I need to figure out how to cope with that, how to react to that, how to act in that.

How to combat that.

How to create in and despite that.

Self-care first -- putting on my own oxygen mask before helping others. That's kind of been the last two very non-productive months. Grieving, raging, accepting. Haven't gotten much beyond that, but I'm starting to get there. Actually wrote a short story start earlier this week. 

But. That's all on 2025, and this is a review of 2024. Which in and of itself, was an okay year for me until election day. Like a flood of sewage that ruins the beautiful village we've worked on and built together, because we didn't work hard enough to maintain the walls on the sewage pond. 

It's an analogy. I'm working on it.

So, 2024: adieu and adios, pretty-decent-until-November year. Can't say as I'm looking forward to your replacement.

Forward, whether I want to or not. 

Courage.

So excited! ART.

 I got a preview peek at my cover art and I am SO EXCITED.  Jordan (Jordan Walker; at Jordan Walker Art) is doing an amazing job. 

His sketches of my alien species are just amazing, too. Really bring them alive. 

Can't wait to share them!

2023 Roundup

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND year-end roundups written in November or December. Dude, you've got DAYS left. You could meet some of those goals! Give yourself the time!

Not that I actually completed any goals in the last waning days of 2023, mind you. I hate reading everyone else's round-ups before I'm willing to start mine.

It doesn't help that I had one primary goal this year that I thought it was perfectly reachable. It was not. The way things are going it might not happen in 2024. SIGH.

So. What I *did* accomplish in 2023:

WRITING

- "Finished" a revision, sent the manuscript to an editor, got her feedback, incorporated her feedback and that of others into the manuscript, and got the new revision  half done. Sent the first half of the book to a trusted reader. 

- Created an LLC, created and set up its website, got several social media accounts set up.

- signed a contract with a cover artist and approved cover sketches; also approved character sketches for interior art.

- Joined SFWA as an associate member

- took a few one-day or half-day classes to keep my motivation up and push my skills

- co-led a weekly short-story crit group all year (handed off the reins to a new chair this month). Created a spreadsheet of all the stories members had sold since the beginning of the pandemic and got their rewards mailed to them. Drafted a code of conduct.

FANDOM

-- attended Norwescon, Miscon, and the Nebulas (online) 

HOBBIES / SELFCARE

- Performed in one recital, one NATS competition, three choir performances and a few smaller sings.

- regular vocal practice

 - Practiced French daily and added Spanish intermittently.

- Maintained PT for various injuries from January through about ... August, when the shift in weather and pet illnesses sapped my motivation. 

- got several projects of a physical nature completed in the yard this summer and was able to do them thanks to the PT I'd been doing.

- caught several mood spirals during the year and was able to stabilize myself and pull back out of them without losing much time. Gave myself some grace in November and December during and after the loss of two aged pets.

- Fantastic Canadian vacation (Banff and Jasper National Parks are amazing); a number of glorious weekend and one-day events with friends and my partner: plays, concerts, or just relaxing. 

ORGANIZATION

- got my taxes to my accountant in February (a massive, massive personal win I'd like to repeat in 2024)

-  got all my short stories filed alphabetically! Got several storage areas gutted and cleared and reorganized! Packed up Halloween 2022 in April 2023!  *covers eyes. Yes, I'm serious* I had help, and I needed it.

SERVICE

- Provided transport to appts and grocery runs for a friend who no longer drives

- produced a weekly newsletter for the choir I sing with during the singing season until this fall, when I handed that off to someone new. 

Huh. I actually did some stuff this year.

That all sounds a lot better than it FELT when I started this roundup compilation yesterday, I'll tell you that. Now I need to find a way to track things that's more consistent and works better for me. The "X words written" doesn't work for revision, and I've never found a metric that does, which is part of why revision feels like such a slog. That and I made decisions slowly, painfully. But. That's for another day. 2023, you are in the can. 2024, you're shiny and new. May I expect only as much of you as you can provide.

Write! A! Ton! er... Write-A-Thon!

 Been busy, and that hasn't translated into writing more on the blog. Need to start doing that again...

BUT I also need to write more short stories. 

So... I'm taking part in Clarion West's Write-a-thon this summer. Check it out!

https://clarionwest.app.neoncrm.com/campaign.jsp?campaign=264&fundraiser=9252&